01 Mar It’s Your Life
I’ve been going to the same church since the second grade. When I first started going to church there, my mother would pick out the clothes that I wore. When I was really little, my outfits usually consisted of frilly dresses. Since I was a tomboy growing up, I absolutely hated having to wear them. Yet, as I got older I started to grow out of my tomboy phase. I wanted to dress up (mainly to impress the boys). And since my change in attitude towards dresses was completely tied to my desire to get attention from the guys my age who went to church with me, the long frilly dresses that my mom made me dress in when I first started attending mass there became too stuffy for me. Ultimately, as I got older and older, the dresses that I wore started to get shorter and shorter. And the shorter the dresses and skirts became the more I started to get reprimanded by the older women at church. Eventually, it seemed like I was getting a stern talking to each and every Sunday that I was at church. When these women would talk to me about the length of my dress or skirt I would just stand there politely and nod my head, but I had no intention of changing what I was wearing.
Now, I don’t typically like to bring religion into these posts because I don’t know what everyone’s religion is, and I don’t have any desire to shove Christianity down anyone’s throat, but I’m going to do it here (sorry). The reason I continued to dress how I pleased was, in part, because of teenage rebellion, but it was also because of lessons I learned while at church. Jesus didn’t turn up his nose at sinners. He embraced them, and I knew that he would welcome me too even if my clothing was a bit too revealing. He knows that human beings aren’t perfect. Yes, I may have been dressing “inappropriately,” but at least I was coming to church every Sunday and doing community service and other things that God would be happy about. That’s why this minor snafu wasn’t that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.
Even though I liked my short skirts and dresses when I was a teen, I shied away from them as I got older. And when I entered adulthood and started to dress more “appropriately” I made sure to let the girls coming up know the lesson that I learned as a teen as well. The same people that judged me when I was a teenager continued to judge the girls that were younger than me when they entered into their teenage years. And since I didn’t want them to feel rejected, I let them know that they should feel free to dress how they wanted to dress. Because I decided to share this message with them, they were thankful that they had someone in their corner who understood what they were going through. As long as they were living authentically and being who they wanted to be, that’s all that really mattered, and that’s all that should really matter to anyone.
You shouldn’t spend your life worrying about what other people think about you. If you’re happy with what you’re doing and how you’re living, then keep on doing what you’re doing (as long as you’re not hurting anyone else in the process). When I was a teenager dressing in short skirts and dresses, I was happy about my clothing choices. It didn’t matter to me that other people had a problem with it. All that mattered was that I didn’t have an issue with how I dressed. If a fifteen year old girl was able of figuring this out then it’s definitely something that adults should be able to do as well.
Live your life positive thinker! Your life belongs to you and nobody else, so don’t ever think that you have to bend over backwards to try and make somebody else happy. If you want to wear short skirts and dresses in your free time then do it, and if you don’t then don’t. There are infinite amounts of choices that you can make in this lifetime, but just make sure that you’re choosing the ones that are going to make you the happiest version of yourself that you can be. Your first priority is to yourself, and you have to live the way that you see fit!