One Step at a Time

one_step_at_a_time

One Step at a Time

I’ve written before about my journey towards finding out what I want to do with my life. When I was younger, I had a plan about what I wanted to do, but that plan started to shift as I got older. As a child, I wanted to be a criminal defense attorney. By the time I got to college I wanted to be in the FBI. I even applied to an internship with them (I didn’t get it, but that didn’t stop me from wanting to pursue that career). My senior year in college, I sent off applications to forensic psychology master’s programs in the hopes that it would be beneficial for my life as an FBI agent. Ultimately, I ended up determining that that wasn’t something that I was interested in doing for the rest of my life. A couple of years ago I decided that I wanted to do research.  It was something that I did during most of the time while I was working on my undergraduate degree, so I figured that I could pick it back up again. However, since it had been awhile since I had been in school, I thought that it would be better for me to get my master’s first before going to get my PhD. So, I entered a program that allowed me to get my feet wet again with doing psychology based research, but it wasn’t long before I realized why I had decided to not pursue research after graduating with my BA in the first place. I wasn’t passionate about it, which is why I stopped doing it after I got my first college degree. At this point, I got really down on myself. I was frustrated that I couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do with my life. It came so easily to other people. I’ve never been afraid of hard work, so the problem wasn’t that I didn’t want to work, the problem was that I couldn’t find anything that I actually wanted to work for. I just wanted to give up. I wanted to not do anything anymore because I couldn’t figure out what I wanted out of life. But I realized that I couldn’t allow myself to do that.

In my search for a job, I figured that I would get back to my roots. I majored in psychology, so I thought that I would look for something in that field. However, since I didn’t have much real-world experience with it, I looked for entry level jobs. One of the first things that popped up was a behavior interventionist. With this job, I work with autistic children. Through applied behavioral analysis, I help to change these kids’ behaviors so that they’re able to function better in the world around them. It’s something that I never saw myself doing, and to be fair, I don’t know if I’ll even still be doing this a year from now, but when the alternative was sitting around doing nothing, I knew the choice that I needed to make. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to figure out what I want to do with my life. I hope that one day that day does come, but until it does, I’ll make sure to keep trying to figure it out.

Positive thinker, if you don’t do anything you can never expect things to change for you. In the morning when you get up for work, you can’t just sit in your home with the hope of magically appearing at your job when you’re supposed to be there. You have to go outside, walk, get in a car, hop on a bike, step on to a bus, or some other form of transportation if you actually want to end up at your place of employment. The same concept goes for the bigger moments in your life. If you want your life to change then you have to do something about it. Taking one step forward, even if it’s a tiny step is better than making no step at all.  So, take that first step positive thinker. And after you take the first one, keep on taking more and more until you get to the place that you want to be!